Most think that personal growth consists of flowers & roses. The opposite is true. Personal growth is the most challenging, confusing, heartbreaking but NECESSARY experience that you may ever go through. The challenging part is not making the decision. It is remembering that you made a decision. Those who forget often find it difficult to reach the place they are yearning to reach. Before I continue, please understand that I am speaking from my own personal experience. It wouldn’t be fair for me to have such a strong opinion on something that I haven’t experienced. Right? Personal growth, also known as “awakening”, occurs when you look in the mirror and face yourself. Easier said than done. I know. But before a change can occur in your outer physical world, it must take place in your inner non-tangible world. The second step in personal growth is accountability. You must be willing to hold yourself accountable for everything that is happening and has happened in your life- this includes your insecurities, fears and doubts.
I started holding myself accountable when I started asking myself, “why do I keep attracting hurt people who feel the need to take their pain out on me?”. However I soon realized that I was asking myself the wrong question, and looking for the answer in the wrong place. I thought that my answer could be found in people and their experiences but the answer actually needed to come from ME. I realized that I was attracting what I was at the time-hurt and wounded. I was in need of the most beautiful gift that we can give ourselves, love. After my revelation, I began to ask myself different questions. I wanted to know what I was holding on to from my past.How far back did my hurt go? What was making me feel like I needed someone, other than myself, to fill my void? How can I stop feeling lonely? This is where my personal growth journey began, and it started off with reading a book entitled “The Four Agreements” by Miguel Ruiz.
This book changed my life! It taught me four agreements that I would make with myself every day. Some may call these agreements affirmations. They are “be impeccable with your word, don’t take anything personally, don’t make assumptions, and always do your best”. It’s been almost five years since I read “ The Four Agreements” and I still refer back to it when needed.
Our personal growth journeys won’t be the same. They aren’t meant to be. Allow your journey to be different. Don’t compare. Allow your journey to be yours. Not theirs. Allow your journey to be about you. Never forget that you made a choice. The choice to grow. The choice to learn. The choice to heal. The choice to be free- free from your insecurities, fears, and doubts. Free from misery. Life can be whatever you want it to be. Make the choice. Remember your choice and experience personal growth.
